Here I am standing in the hallways, alone, but with everyone. Friends, acquaintances, those people with the hair (mama haha), they all pass me, some making eye contact, some pushing past me. All living a life that is intertwined someway in God's plan. We all meet people for a reason, we lose them for the same fact. Some come back, some never left in the first place. I am so happy with everything, I hold no regrets anymore, I feel spiritually stronger, and on the right track. I think I might be with the right guy, and have the right friends. That make more treasured memories that I am happy wont ever fade :3 Oh happy days, no more sad days of regretting, or thinking what ifs. Oh course I'll be down because I failed a math test or because I got in a fight with my mom, but I am still alive, and just being alive by the side of the people you will always love, makes today another perfect day.

So yesh, I just bought myself an xbox 360 and also purchased Halo!! woots, so yeah if you want you guys should play with me:
my name is Rilowen
games so far kung fu panda und Halo
Times on= weekends/days off school and maybe during testing since its min days ^^


anyways, hope to see yas there! woots! so lets play play play noowww!

If only the world knew of the universe I live in, where every time I blink the scene changes. Most people think that my reasons of my joy and energy is because I am a druggie (HA!), too bad I don't need drugs to enjoy this world God blessed us with. I take a step out into the cold air dressed in virtually nothing as he holds my hand. My feet hitting every sharp object on the floor, me pretending not to notice the pains. My mind was cluttered with nothings, but he knows more than I do. As we dance away from reality. Then I blink and we're running around with fire spiting from cardboard. Listening to the mumbles as the boys interact. I just stand there smiling knowing life is content. Driving around in Evan's mustang because it's "cooler" yet I blink and the boys are racing and I am in the passengers seat of the elky. Who can get to John's house first? Heh, not this car. Its fine though, we drove slowly on purpose, knowing that there's a law for a reason and just holding hands... Playing Halo during late hours until I fall asleep on the mic. Watching a laptop's brain surgery go great until a big mistake happened that called the whole deal off, now this poor thing has some screws missing... JC's footprint is still on the screen. A mother's eye watching as we are "devious" in her mind. I turn my head to see John dressed in a button up shirt and classy pants as he stuffs donuts into his mouth at the front door. We embrace for I know it's hard, but church is something important to me, and its cute how he shows his respect by accidentally overdressing. Then how he quickly changes to spend time with me at Brudters as Shae and I giggle and John/Jon sit there staring at their Apple cards. I blink to watch John's ghost everywhere in his kitchen making me random meals, from the best steak in the world to burgers to homemade chicken noodle to pancakes. Then in my kitchen he takes a bite of my eggs and actually likes them. So many moments, i cant even list, but every time I don't need to remember when the proof is staring back at my face noticing the little things how we are destined in my private Universe. Now I cuddle up with the scarf he knitted me and play with my toys he gave me wishing him well at Mt. High. Right now I am getting ready for a Mama Kat so we can go on another "date" to which John proclaims he has a competitor! Silly dorks. Thank you everyone, for waiting out the bad and enjoying the fruits of God with me. Thank you boys for all the useful presents :3
And Thank you, John, for everything, and especially for still being there when I blink.

I cannot believe this is happening, a ship blowing up and me walking peacefully.
Waves of the shore reveal parts and pieces, and I can pin point them, and shrug away
I could hear a heartbeat within the sand, my curiosity had me search until it was found.
Now that it's there in my hands, the heart of another mans, salt water finds a drop
I lick the drop to steal its salt, and to quench my final thirst for it.
That was the last time my cheeks were stained in water. that was the last time I died.
I was her, I was Rilow, not Rilo, I changed for the worst, and lost my life boat.
If you look kindly to the East you may see that dead corpse of her. The angel of pain.
I became a ghost, in search for life, in search for death. On that path I grew up, and ran into an old friend. The young girl who has been sitting in a cove, her singing is her life, her art in the sky. Riley my little one, I've re-found you at last.
Riley and I became one once again, and upon our rejoice, we heard the heartbeat again.
As of today, humpty dumpty was put back together again.
I feel that this might return into love once again, it will take time for that, but for now, I am giving this a shot. Rilow gave away too much, and died from it. I really care about you, Love. Just give me some time.

Hi hi! Riley is back online for deviant, that is. so I'll update my drawings once my scanner likes me again, hehe. Also add some animation, right Cam?? haha, oh, right... I might be different, for I have been reborn, I am Rilowen, and it's about time! (translation: I feel more mature, my lose ends are finally fixed. as my dearest said "Life hurts, God heals." I am glad, I am not broken, thanks to my Lord <3) Thanks to all of you who was patient for me to get back up on my feet, and thank you the most Rhion and Krissy. I will miss everyone, but hey, moving wont stop us from being dorks! I love you all, very much. Brace yourself, for life is getting fun!